These things are sent to test us....

Well I am finally ready to talk about it and I think the wine I had tonight has probably helped me to come to this conclusion...

I went to the hospital on Monday for my test results.  Was kind of strange going back there after being chemo free for 3 weeks now.  Sadly did not get the results I was hoping for and understandably this has upset me a little bit.

The doctor explained to me that there was about a 30% improvement in my Lymphoma and that another course of chemo was the best answer.  They are always saying that there are new medicines out and he wants to try something different this time.  He actually wanted to start there and then, but I had to get my head round things all over again.

I ended up walking more than 5 miles from the hospital to my house (well my car was in Wales) and as Davey of the Crimea sings "...just don't mention Tuesday..."

It was kind of strange though as I did not realised I walked that far.  Anyone that knows me, knows that I drive 200 yards to the tram stop to go into town, because I am a lazy cow that does not do walking, so walking 5 miles was definately a shock thing.

Getting to grips with this makes you put things into categories and whilst part of me does not want the constant sickness and crappy side effects, the other part of me has so very much to look forward to.  Life is so good to me most of the time (you would not have guessed it this week) but it is!  I have come to realise one thing:  I do not want to die!!! Well not yet anyway, fuck it I am not ready and that is that.

So Monday we start again!  Buckets at the ready, with fingers crossed, hoping and praying that I am well enough to enjoy the 16th July!

In the meantime I met some nice people at lunch and hopefully can tell you more about that tomorrow.  Whilst at lunch got the excellent news that BC Camplight (all the way from Philly) are going to be playing my Snow Patrol aftershow Party.  Helen and I got a little excited when I got that phone call, but that totally made my day.  Oh btw lunch at Bar Seven - YUMMY!!!